Happy Father's Day! (a couple days late)

When The Good Lord Was Creating Fathers

Written by: Erma Bombeck

He started with a tall frame.

An angel nearby said "What kind of a Father is that?
If you're going to make children so close to the ground,
Why have you put the Father up so high?
He won't be able to shoot marbles without kneeling,
Play pretend drinking tea, and kiss dolly goodnight,
tuck a child in bed without bending,
or even kiss a child without stooping."

God smiled and said,
"Yes,but if I make him child size,
who would children have to look up to?"

And when God made a Father's hands, they were large.
The angel said, "Large hands can't manage diaper pins,
small buttons, rubber bands on pony tails,
or even remove splinters caused from baseball bats."

Again God smiled and said,
"I know, but they're large enough to hold
everything a small boy empties from his pockets,
all the paper dolls, sing songs, jump rope,
and teach her to turn cartwheels.
Yet small enough to cup a child's face in them."

Then God molded long slim legs and broad shoulders,
"Do you realize you just made a Father without a lap?"

God said, "A Mother needs a lap.
A Father needs strong shoulders to
pull a wagon, to balance a bicycle,
or to hold a sleepy head on the way home from the circus."

When God was in the middle of creating
the biggest body any one had ever seen,
the angel said, "That's not fair.
Do you honestly think that form is going to get
out of bed early in the morning when the baby cries,
or walk through a birthday party without
crushing one or two of the guests?"

God again smiled and said,
"It will work. You will see.
It will support a small child who wants to ride to Banbury Cross
or scare mice away from a summer cabin,
or walk in shoes that will be a challenge to fill."

God worked throughout the night,
giving the Father few words,
but a firm authoritative voice;
eyes that see everything,
but remain calm and tolerant.

Finally, almost as an after thought,
He added tears. Then he turned to the angel and said,
"Now are you satisfied he can love as much as a Mother can?"

The angel said nothing more.

On this Father's Day (a couple days late), I would like to wish a couple special men a Happy Father's Day, first to my own father, who I affectionately call Daddy, and

second, to the love of my life and the father of my children, Rich a.k.a. Hubba Hubba.