Keep a straight face at all costs

Before I begin, first I guess I should give some background info.; for Braden's fourth birthday Linda, Rich's mama, sent Braden a gift certificate along with a catalog, so he could pick out what he wanted. Well, Braden decided he wanted one of those huge balls you can sit on and bounce or "hop" around on, which is why he started referring to it as the hopper. So, I went online and ordered his hopper, and so began the praying. Every time he had a chance to pray, he prayed that his hopper would come in the mail, and if anyone else prayed, he would whisper to you to pray for his hopper to come in the mail. To say that he loves his big yellow hopper would be an understatement. When the long awaited day came, he was beside himself with excitement; he couldn't wait to blow that sucker up and hop around the house. Then began the prayers thanking Heavenly Father for letting his hopper come in the mail. Okay, so you get the picture; he LOVES the hopper! Well, on to the reason for the title, 'Keep a straight face at all costs'; tonight at dinner Braden was a little less than enthusiastic about the chili we were having, but I would like to point out that Rich loves it! I wanted to put that little disclaimer in there in case any of you were wondering if I was trying to feed my child anything that was vile; of course my version of vile and his are totally different. He'll pick something off the floor and eat it, but often turns his nose up at what I have cooked. Luckily, Brooke tells me almost on a daily basis that she likes what I cook; I especially love it when she takes a bite of supper and exclaims, "Delicioso!" Let's just say tonight at supper, the table became a battleground. We bribed, we cajoled, we threatened, but our labors were fruitless; he wanted no part of the chili. He was fine eating his cornbread and calling it a night, thank you very much. We however have a rule that he must try everything on his plate or bowl in this case. We created this rule after trying everything else in the book: let him go hungry, keep introducing it and eventually he will try it, shove it in his mouth and tell him to chew (sad, I know), and limiting his milk intake to ensure hunger at mealtimes; I read articles, books, and internet sites, hoping for some sage advice on how to get my extremely "SELECTIVE" son (notice the positive spin I put on that) to eat the meals I prepared. Finally, I decided that the books and all the advice needed to be chunked out the window; as a child I too was "SELECTIVE", and I had to at least try everything on my plate. I started thinking about supper as a child, Did I like everything we ate? No. Did I have to try everything? Yes. Did I have some psychological scarring or eating disorder as a result? No. Would Braden be scarred for life? No, well not for this anyway; according to Rich the scarring will come from his poop party, but I digress. Rich and I also have been reading 'Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood', which is a fantastic book by the way (my sister in law recommended it), so Rich pulled out one of their bits of wisdom and finally sent Braden to his room and told him he could come back when he was ready to eat. So, after a couple minutes Braden comes back into the kitchen with a big grin on his face, obviously happy that he is out of his room and thinks he is being disobedient. Rich and I kept our cool and both said, "Oh, Braden you are out of your room, you must be ready to eat." "We are so glad you are going to eat with us." Braden however, was not ready to eat or sit at the table, so Rich again took him to his room and told him again that he could come out when he was ready to eat with us. Yes, you guessed it; after a couple minutes Braden again came out of his room. Did he walk out? No. Did he run out? No. Did he skip out? No. He hopped out, gloriously sitting atop his big yellow hopper, his face spread into a huge grin. I looked at Braden, I looked at Rich, and then I hid my face behind a paper. In these situations it is important to 'Keep a straight face at all costs! I however at the moment was in awe of my son's comedic timing, and I knew I would be unable to maintain the stoic parenting face that was needed for the moment. That's right, I was a giggling coward; I hid behind my paper and joyously laughed, while Rich calmly dealt with the situation. Once Braden was again placed in his room, Rich too got to join me. It makes me wonder how many times my parents secretly got some entertainment from my antics! I guess the trick is to keep that stoic face, so your children do learn the lesson they need to learn; no one said though that parents can't roar with laughter when the children are out of earshot! Hey, we have to keep our sanity anyway we can!

In Our House Silence Means FEAR

If you stop, listen, and hear nothing, in our house you should be afraid, very afraid! Silence means that Brooke or Braden are yet again up to something. Does it take a matter of minutes for them to destroy, annihilate, break, or demolish? No, it takes only mere seconds, so we in the Maseda household are on constant alert; as soon as you let your guard down, paint ends up on the carpet, marker covered children appear in the doorway, chapstick handprints cover the bedroom wall, Brooke ends up covered in nail polish from head to toe, and various items end up in your toilet. Last night we experienced the toilet fiasco. Brooke and Braden were both in the bathroom going potty, should have been our first clue to be more vigilant; we however were so glad to finally have an adult conversation, that Rich and I let our guard down. Then I hear from the bathroom, "Mommy, Brooke put her panties in the toilet!" I look at Rich, "Rich, Braden said Brooke put her panties in the toilet." Rich's response, "No way, she has been sitting there the whole time, she couldn't have." (This is Brooke we are talking about, heaven knows how she does half the things she does) Trusting Rich's judgement I return to the conversation, when I hear, "Mommy, Brooke put her pajama pants in the toilet." I again look at Rich, "Rich, Braden said that Brooke put her pajama pants in the toilet." Again, Rich repeats his wisdom, and again, I naively follow it. I however should know better; I am home with Miss Destructo every day, and I know her cunning ways. Feeling lazy, I hope for the best and feign ignorance, not really wanting to deal with what I am almost positive is transpiring in the bathroom. However, about 30 minutes later, I can no longer turn a blind eye to Braden hurriedly stuffing his plastic animals into the toilet. I guess Braden thought, Hey, if Brooke can get away with it, so can I (what's good for the goose is for the gander); just in case though, let me be quick about it. Alas, Braden has not (thankfully) quite mastered cunning, so he is caught redhanded or should I say animal handed by Rich and I. Without sharing all the gory details we'll just say Rich was able to rescue and extract all of the animals and Brooke's panties from the toilet. Her cute Hawaiian flowered pajama pants I hate to say, are no more. They are now a permeanent resident of the sewage system. The moral of this story, 'Trust the little boy who loves to tattle and get off of your duff and check on your little rascal daughter.' 'If you think she is up to something, 9 out of 10 times you're right!'

The Surprise that Wasn't

The Surprise that Wasn't, oh how that title fits this weekend so perfectly. Rich and I went home back to South Carolina this weekend for what was supposed to be a surprise party for my Daddy, but alas, several people spilled the beans, beginning with my Grandmama. I guess the only way to keep a secret is to not tell anyone, but then how do you get anyone to the appointed place at the appointed time? Either way, Daddy had a great time! What better way to celebrate the big 6-0 than surrounded by family?! Saturday we went out to eat at Jimmy Buffet's Margaritaville at Broadway at the Beach, and then we went back to Paul's apartment to open presents, eat cake, and show Daddy the DVD I made just for his birthday. I think it was all a success, because Daddy loved it! All the work and the late nights getting ready for everything were for him, and when I saw how happy he was, it was all worth it; it was even worth the big ugly bags I have under my eyes now from lack of sleep! My Daddy has touched so many lives, and I hope after this weekend he knows that and realizes how much he is loved!

My daughter the comedian

Brooke has become a regular little comedian; she will do whatever it takes to get attention. Tonight we were attempting to film the cuties telling their Grandpa happy birthday. I thought it would be nice to add a little video of his grandkids at the end of his birthday DVD; we did get one successful take, but this however is not one of them. Braden does a great job as you will see, but Brooke decides getting a good laugh was more important than cooperating; I hate to admit it, but it worked. Rich and I were so caught off guard, that we both laughed despite ourselves. I guess Brooke wanted to teach her Grandpa how to end a prayer rather than wish him a happy birthday.

Here is the successful take.

The Infamous Poop Party

Yes, you read correctly; today we had a POOP party. And what do you serve at a poop party? Well, chocolate cupcakes with chocolate frosting and tootsie rolls of course! And what do you wash those poop inspired cupcakes down with? Well, yellow lemonade of course! As Rich puts it, "You have to have some pee to wash your poop down with." I know it may all sound very crude, but I promised Braden and Brooke that when they both learned to use the potty without any accidents, we would have a Poop party to celebrate the grand, amazing, miraculous event! I can't say I've ever heard of a poop party before, but hey, why can't this be a first?! Rich is out of town, but he called today to see what we were up to; I told him that we were getting ready for the poop party. He asked me if our children would ever be normal after this, I say, anyone that is known for pooping on his brother's bike has no room to talk! Brooke and I dropped Braden off at school this morning then came home and got to work. We used the accent decorator to put the frosting on to look like poop, and then Brooke helped me mold the tootsie rolls into realistic looking poop; after we decided the cupcakes were sufficiently covered with what looked like poop, we started on the lemonade. After preparing the food and doing some last minute straightening, we went to get Braden from school, so the festivities could begin. We invited some neighbors and a couple people from church, so after everyone was there we ate our cupcakes, drank our lemonade, played a game, and then they played with toys. We were going to set up the sprinkler outside for all of the children, but they were more content to stay in and just play with each other. I think it is safe to say that the poop party was a hit, and I am ecstatic that Braden and Brooke are now potty trained; I wondered if it this day was EVER going to come, but luckily it happened in time to safe my sanity! Of course, now comes a whole new set of problems. Imagine: you are in the line in Wal-mart, exhausted, ready to get through the line, pay for your things, and get out of the blasted place, when you hear the dreaded words, "Mommy, I have to use the bathroom."

Brooke's first haircut

Well, tonight I cut Braden's and Brooke's hair. Don't worry; I only trimmed Brooke's hair. I wouldn't dare cut off her beautiful blonde curls; she wouldn't let me even if I did want to. It was her first time getting her hair cut, but she came through with flying colors; I'm sure bribing her with a sucker also helped. Here are some pictures of the grand event.

Motherly wisdom

My mama keeps telling me that I need to write down all the things the children do in a journal, but journaling is not exactly a strong point for me; in fact, I don't even know if my own journal knows that I got pregnant let alone had Emma. Well, I finally decided I needed to heed her motherly advice and conquer my journaling weakness, so Friday night Rich and I went to Wal-mart, and I bought 3 beautiful turquoise notebooks; I thought their beauty might inspire me. My goal is to start each journal with a description of each child, and then from then on write a little tidbit every day, sometimes just a couple sentences and sometimes several paragraphs. I also have recruited Rich in on my mission; I told him that both of us could write in the journal, because they will love to look back and read thoughts from their father as well. My goal is also to write the journal addressing each child, so they will feel like we are talking to them; I hope the journals will end up being something they treasure throughout the years, and I hope this will give me a kick in the butt to get better at writing in my own journal. I can blog all day, but I can't seem to take my pink journal out of the drawer beside my bed.

The first journal entry in Brooke's journal:

You are a vivacious, sassy, prissy, beautiful 2 1/2 year old. You have gorgeous blond curly hair, big blue eyes, a sweet little mouth, and a petite frame. You make me laugh one minute and want to scream the next! You have a mind and a mouth that never quit, and I am constantly amazed at your vast vocabulary. You are so anxious to learn and take on the world; you never miss a thing! I can't do or say anything without you taking notice, and heaven forbid, imitating me! You keep me on my toes 24/7. I love how much you love life; the world is your oyster, and you are loved by all. With your sweet little voice, your sassy ways, and your fireball spirit you melt hearts and recruit more members to the Brooke fan club, which is great, because you are your happiest as the center of attention! In fact, it would be more accurate to say that you DEMAND attention! Your daddy and I love you to pieces, and we consider ourselves blessed that Heavenly Father let you be part of our family! You are our sassy, dramatic, funny, smart, beautiful Brooke, and you are one of a kind! We love you sweetheart, more than you can imagine!

Labor Day Fun and Festivities

Yesterday was Labor Day, so we decided to do very little laboring and do a lot of relaxing and having fun as a family. We did start the day with some cleaning, but the rest of the day was spent having a picnic, going to the pool, and chowing down on some ribs. I of course, took tons of pictures of our day; though I get accused of being a Japanese tourist, I love to take pictures. When I look back at pictures, I am able to relive the moments of the past and think of those I love; when I look at the pictures from yesterday I remember how blessed I felt as I watched my children splash around in the pool with their daddy.